whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
