I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize