remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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