operation harelip BJ is a go
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
