Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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