Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  it's too hot outside to masturbate.

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  (310): it's too hot outside to masturbate. http://tfl.nu/dql5
  Replies (19) Good night (596) Bad night (1542)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.

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  (765): I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot. http://tfl.nu/lv0c
  Replies (101) Good night (1538) Bad night (4555)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.

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  (703): Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates. http://tfl.nu/cs1d
  Replies (24) Good night (1594) Bad night (4085)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks

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  (980): I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks http://tfl.nu/h8ue
  Replies (29) Good night (840) Bad night (4843)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.

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  (254): There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN. http://tfl.nu/m7t2
  Replies (35) Good night (7173) Bad night (1405)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  she was licking his armpits.

  (317): View more from Indiana

  asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.

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  (317): she was licking his armpits. (317): asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story. http://tfl.nu/2ll0
  Replies (24) Good night (1030) Bad night (4978)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.

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  (850): I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think. http://tfl.nu/r53a
  Replies (7) Good night (1149) Bad night (2678)
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  (323): View more from California

  Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.

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  (323): Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl. http://tfl.nu/6wl6
  Replies (32) Good night (2120) Bad night (4150)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.

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  (773): I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax. http://tfl.nu/p0im
  Replies (10) Good night (2376) Bad night (974)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.

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  (907): You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield. http://tfl.nu/kh6y
  Replies (7) Good night (1994) Bad night (1098)
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  (619): View more from California

  definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius

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  (619): definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius http://tfl.nu/ay4s
  Replies (25) Good night (2883) Bad night (840)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?

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  (919): At what point would you like us to save you from yourself? http://tfl.nu/30aa
  Replies (3) Good night (1924) Bad night (670)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.

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  (289): If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf. http://tfl.nu/kp2h
  Replies (2) Good night (1347) Bad night (506)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.

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  (407): For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it. http://tfl.nu/uopt
  Replies (18) Good night (464) Bad night (1302)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.

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  (586): I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird. http://tfl.nu/l2d5
  Replies (13) Good night (1153) Bad night (304)

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