I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
