Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
