walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
