discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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