i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize