I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
