I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
