I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I'm passing your future prison.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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