i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Randomize
