STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
