Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
i've created a new STD.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
