paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
there is puke in my bra ... again
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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