If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
