It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
