Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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