hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
