Pappa wants mamma naked
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
