so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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