So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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