What did we do last night that was yellow?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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