Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
we're so committed to being not committed
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
