I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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