do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
