Sorry, I don't speak sober.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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