he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
