i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
