my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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