hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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