With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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