can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
