That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
