Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
