Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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