I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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