Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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