Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
