if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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