My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize