Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
