sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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