At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
