She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
