I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
