You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Randomize
